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I will send them a picture of my Wookiee Suit

I came back from vacation with a summons for jury duty waiting for me. The odds of me getting on a jury are about zero. They don’t like people who pay attention and advocate jury nullification of stupid laws.

Oddly, on the summons for reasons to get dismissed, there’s no check box for will judge the facts and the law.

17 Responses to “I will send them a picture of my Wookiee Suit”

  1. Robert Says:

    While I’ve not gotten one in many years, my wife has gotten them twice recently, and both times I’ve had to call them and let them know that she is not a US citizen and therefore can’t be on a jury…

  2. Dustydog Says:

    When I had jury duty and they told everyone to raise their right hand and recite an oath, I didn’t raise my hand and didn’t speak. I figured I might have to explain, but I’m not swearing an oath I haven’t had time to read, digest, and assent to. I figured – this is America, if they mean for me to pay attention they will repeat themselves 3 more times. (although the idea of getting arrested for refusing to swear made me laugh – imagine jury selection for that trial).

    I got bumped by a premptory challenge. If the case is civil, I can see Uncle serving. But even the worst criminal defense attornies can count well enough to save a premptory challenge for Uncle. “The guy that keeps twitching because his subconcious keeps realizing that he doesn’t have his concealed carry gun because he is in a courthouse? Yeah, we challenge that guy.”

  3. mikee Says:

    I’d be surprised if the voire dire gets as far as that fundamental level before you get dismissed. Having any knowledge seems to be a way off a jury.

    As a Chemist, I got dismissed three times over the years immediately after being asked what I did, by both defense and prosecutors. So you likely will have a short stay in the jury pool.

  4. Patrick Says:

    Uncle could just wear his “Right Wing Gun Nut” T-Shirt and forget to shave for a few days.

    Or sit on the jury. A few smart people sitting on juries would mess up the whole damn system.

    If I had time, I’d volunteer monthly.

  5. Barron Barnett Says:

    I’ve decided that if I’m called for jury duty I will do exactly like my dad. I won’t work to get off the jury, however I won’t work to get on the jury.

    Mikee is right, for the most part they don’t like people with actual legal knowledge on a jury. Which is why it was all the more funny when my dad, with a Juris Doctorate, ended up on a jury. Yes the defendant went free, mainly because of my dad and his ability to sway the jury.

    I look at it this way, with me on the jury I can buck the system from the inside. Off the jury I can do nothing but watch.

  6. Mr Evilwrench Says:

    I’ve been called once. Fortunately I was in the first group seated for voire dire, so I didn’t have to stay long. I wasn’t trying to get out, I just know I’m exactly what one side or the other won’t want.

  7. mikee Says:

    On the other hand, I got seated on one jury in MD because the defendant was acting as his own lawyer. The prosecutor started off by saying every single juror was OK by him, and the defendant picked a random group of 12 plus one alternate from the many, many people there. The defendant’s name was Elvis, believe it or not.

    He was a coke dealer. His wife refused to testify for the defense, in fear of losing her kids because she could be charged as an accomplice. His defense against the undercover FBI agents who bought a kilo from him was that the coke wasn’t his, it was really the property of his biker buddies. He just stored it in his mobile home, did the deal for it and took their money for it, before handing it over personally while on tape the whole time.

    He acted as his own attorney as a delaying tactic, having fired his court appointed attorney just before jury selection started. He was doing time in county for drug sales, and thought the trips to the city for this other trial were more fun than sitting in his cell, so he dragged it out as long as possible.

    That the pile of magazines in the jury room was topped by a Sports Illustrated issue with Len Bias on the cover probably had no impact, and may even have been unintentional on the part of the bailiffs.

    Either way, we convicted Elvis of 3 counts each carrying a mandatory 10 years. The only question would be the concurrent or consecutive service of that penalty with his other sentence in county, which happened later.

  8. Will Says:

    Was a finalist in jury selection, when the question was asked if any of us had been, or knew anyone that had been, the victim of a crime. They ran me out of there so fast, I think I left a trail of disturbed papers. It was for a robbery with knife. I wanted to work it, looked interesting. I’ll keep my mouth shut next time, if they ever call me again.

  9. Kristopher Says:

    Will: Are you a crime victim if anyone who has ever attacked you has been either shot dead or held for the police?

  10. Al Says:

    Much disappointed that I never get to serve on a jury. Got called a few times in the past 14 years. On criminal cases once they found I was employed by an LE agency, the fun ended quickly (once when I walked into the courtroom with the rest of the jury pool for voire dire the judge addressed me by name and asked what I was doing there; when I said “well, I got this letter in the mail…” she responded with “you won’t be here long.”). On civil cases my engineering degree is always the killer. At least they bought me lunch each time.

  11. Mike123 Says:

    I wish productive citizens and gun owners were more willing to sacrifice their time to serve on juries.

    There may be an innocent man who needs our help. He might be a gun-owner like the people arrested in NY City.

    They need our help and by avoiding the duty, they will be found guilty by the only people who don’t mind sitting in a government building: parasitic welfare cheats and government bureaucrats.

  12. Prodigal Son Says:

    “Oddly, on the summons for reasons to get dismissed, there’s no check box for will judge the facts and the law.”

    They don’t want to alert the unknowing that they even have that right. Hence, no box.

  13. Heather Says:

    Got selected once, then told I didn’t have to show up the day of. Husband just got called in, but while we are residents of that particular state, we are not currently living there, thanks to Uncle Sam. So no-go there, too (though he did tell them he’d be totally willing if they’d pay for his plane ticket!)

  14. Siergen Says:

    In all my years of eligibility in three different states, I have only been called once for jury duty. Not sure why, since I have been registered to vote the entire time…

  15. Skip Says:

    Just served on the 2011/2012 Grand Jury.
    Was very enlightening. I think we did some good.

  16. Classical Liberal Says:

    I have set on a panel several times. Never been picked for the final pool. One time I was explicitly struck as I was low in the numbers, but not 100% sure why but I have a guess as to why I was struck.

  17. Spade Says:

    I’ve always wanted to serve on a jury. I finally got my first jury notice two weeks ago to serve last week….in the town 50 miles from me in which I used to live. Damnit.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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