Hola
The Mrs. and I have returned from Mexico. A couple of notes on the trip:
The beaches on the Mayan Riviera are beautiful.
The food was amazing and at the resorts your water is bottled so you don’t have to worry about the trots.
The first two days, we sat around the beach and pool consuming many drinks. On day three, we went scuba diving at the world’s second largest reef, which was a blast. The Mrs. hated that whole breathing through a tube thing so odds are she won’t be doing that again.
We went shopping in Cozumel. Shopping in Mexico is interesting. The vendors know that you won’t pay the price they ask for and you know that you’ll typically get a 50% (often more discount) from the asking price. They’d make more sales if they just told you upfront what minimum price they want for an item. I saw (and I’m not making this up) a guy attempting to purchase some sort of polished stone bracelet for his wife. He asks the vendor how much? The vendor says $150. The guy says $25. The vendor responds with $55 (yes, $95 off the bat). This went on until the American gets the vendor to $28. The American still walked away.
As you walk through the market area in Cozumel, all the shop owners want you in their shop. My Spanish is rusty, but it usually goes like this: You walk past a shop and the shop owner says Senor y pretty lady, co’ look eeside which translates roughly as Excuse me, but I can’t help notice that you currently are not involved in purchasing any useless crap. Perhaps you would like to peruse my vast selection of useless crap. There are several responses that you, the shopper, can make:
1 – Ignore the request, which doesn’t work because they’ll think you’re hard of hearing and then come stand in front of you pointing at their store. At which point you have a few more options.
2 – Say Gracias, no which, judging by their reaction, translates roughly as Why don’t you insert some of that useless crap into an orifice of your choosing!
3 – Say No dinero which doesn’t go over really well because they never believe you and point you to their credit card machine.
4 – Tell them to insert some of their useless crap into an orifice of their choosing, which they don’t understand or they’re just being polite.
5 – Enter the shop.
If you enter the shop, you are treated to a wide variety of stuff, such as: all things related to marijuana (pipes, bongs, you name it); T-Shirts with clever slogans like One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor or Let’s 68 – You do me and I’ll owe you one; Cuban cigars (a lot of which are fake); Jewelry (mostly fake); Liquor (not fake, but usually cheap); and blankets.
Me and the Mrs. also toured some Mayan ruins, which was interesting. I decided that anthropologists had too much time on their hands because when the guide told us that a pyramid that served as a watchtower had really tall steps (compared to a temple which had shallow steps) that it was to force people to bow (by bending to climb the steps) out of respect to the gods. Wouldn’t they do that at the temple? I concluded that the steps were tall for ease of defense since you don’t want any invaders taking over your watchtowers, you make it hard to climb. The Mrs. informed me that my hypothesis probably wouldn’t get me a several thousand dollar grant and the off the wall theories would. The ruins were amazing: Steep steps, tall structures, and thousands of years old. We got to climb a couple temples which was quite a task and took some amazing pictures. Apparently, the Mayans just abandoned their cities one day, so the anthropologist told us. They had many theories as to why. After my tour, I had my own theory: The Mayans had a class system (anthropology man told us) and the workers were treated like crap (and kept uneducated). I concluded they revolted and killed the priests and upper classes. However, they also killed everyone who knew how to write. So, I think they were still there for a while after that but couldn’t write dates on stones (like the upper classes did). After our archaeology and anthropology lessons, we toured an existing Mayan village. I really expected Sally Struthers to appear as the conditions were squalid. The guide told us that they weren’t poor, but lived differently than us. I’m here to tell you, they were poor. Some of them had satellite TV though.
On our departure date, our flight was canceled (after waiting around for six hours) but our airline put us up in an amazing resort with free drink and food. Then the next day, we were to fly out at 10:00. We left closer to 1:00 because (and again, I am not making this up) the incoming flight actually turned around to pick up 40 people who were late to their flight to Cancun. You can check out anytime you like but you can never leave.
The news that I read in Mexico that leapt out at me (followed by a brief analysis) was:
The EPA chick resigned (I’m sure Bubba is ecstatic) – Good!
The terror level went high – Bad!
Ari resigned (so much for the press getting the secretary it deserves) – Ugly!
So, I’m back. I’m tan, rested, ready, and have muy blog reading to do. Then it’s back to your regularly scheduled meanderings.
