If all goes as planned, in two weeks I’ll be a dad. Some random things that I have learned, noticed, or done:
Male nesting. It’s real. You don’t have the uncontrollable urge to clean. What you will have is the uncontrollable urge to build stuff. In the last two weeks, I have built a workbench, a dog house, a growth chart, and a small wooden box. This is in addition to my ordinary tinkering (built a computer, added some modifications to my Ruger 10/22, and set up a home network).
Your body knows. You start sleeping less. I suppose it’s nature’s way of getting you ready for the sleepless nights you have coming.
Since I’m having a girl, I will apparently develop (in about 15 to 16 years) the desire to want to beat the crap out of every pimply faced kid that looks at her funny. Time to start learning to control that desire now.
Apparently, everything on the planet causes SIDS. Seriously. Particularly, anything you may get secondhand has an increased risk of causing SIDS. It’s true. The result, we bought all new stuff. Sounds to me like a scam by the people who make new stuff.
Even though everything causes SIDS, no one knows what causes SIDS. It’s totally true. Ask your doctor. They’ll tell you they don’t know. But they do know that secondhand stuff causes it. It’s really strange.
You cannot get out of Babies R Us without spending at least $300.
Two common features of baby stuff: 1) It’s expensive; and 2) it’s disposable. Two hundred dollar car seat will be outgrown in only a few months.
On sex, neither you nor your partner have the desire.
Some of the details of pregnancy are better left unknown to the father. Mucus plugs? Ick!
After attending birthing class, the video was all of the miracle of birth I want to ever see. The video shows some women you don’t know. I can’t imagine watching the woman I love go through that. I’ll be there, in the room, with my wife. I will not, however, play catch or in any way get on the business end of the deal.
The part that really scares the woman is, surprisingly, not the pain but the fact she may make number 2 in front of about four people.
When the baby first starts moving in such a way as it can be felt, as soon as your wife calls you over there to feel it, it will stop. This will frustrate you and annoy your wife who won’t be able to understand why you’re not as excited as her.
Later, it’s amazing to actually see what is identifiably the impression of a foot on a woman’s abdomen.
You will see strength in the woman you love you have never seen before. It is truly inspiring.