In your face
Have you ever noticed how frightened people are of confrontation–even if it just means the slightest bit of displeasure from another person? Normally, these non-confronters think of themselves as “very good and moral people” and believe the reason they do not confront is to save another’s feelings. But in truth, they are so afraid of causing themselves a moment’s displeasure, that they will do anything to get out of being direct with another person.
Yes. But she and I (and very likely you) are probably more confrontational than most because of a group of people we belong to. See, we’re bloggers and blog readers. I’d say this activity would intentionally draw confrontation and disagreement. And we do this sort of thing for that, at least on some level.
May 29th, 2006 at 11:16 am
Even though I’m a bully (I’ve stated so in the comments here before), I still strive to avoid confrontation. I don’t like it or enjoy it. But sometimes it is necessary. I don’t know that “sometimes” is the right word, it’s more often than that.
I’ve tried to extend my vocabulary so I have different ways to say things, but I’m learning that most times, one needs to say “no”. plain and simple. But instead of that, I’ve used phrases like;
“That will work, but …”
“Unfortunately, there is an issue with …”
“This will need some minor changes …”
“I agree with you on most of your points …”
I’ve found that many people don’t understand they are being told “no”. I work with very smart, college degreed professionals.
I am sure I am taking Dr. Helen’s point out of context, as I haven’t read the linked post, but this is what popped into my head as I read your post. I agree with her. And I agree with you. But I think everyone has that displeasure.