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I’d suggest a suppressed 22 and a deep fryer

Wild chickens roaming the Bronx.

10 Responses to “I’d suggest a suppressed 22 and a deep fryer”

  1. Zendo Deb Says:

    That would be illegal in NY City! I recommend a really good air-rifle. Something that throws a .22 pellet at a 1000 ft per sec.

    Though that may be illegal in NY City too

  2. Zendo Deb Says:

    If they get some cats with extra toes, it will be just like Key West. Except for the weather.

  3. Spook45 Says:

    Just herd them towards Queens and let nature take its coarse. BUY MORE AMMO

  4. John Smith Says:

    All you need is the deep fryer and some chicken feed. Those chickens are very docile. And quite plump.

  5. Cemetery's Gun Blob Says:

    1010 WINS had a story on yesterday about three coyotes in Manhattan.

    But now I got a hankerin’ for some chicken.

  6. Mik Says:

    Wait until the Manhattan coyotes discover the Bronx chickens….

  7. Huck Says:

    There was Turkeys running loose in Boston, Geese in Philly, now Chickens in New York and no one’s added them to the dinner menu?

    Hell, these Yankee city folks dont recognize a free meal when they see it!

  8. Kevin S Says:

    Just make sure there’s no trans fats used in that deep fryer, citizen!

  9. nk Says:

    There’s a story about an urban hunter in Detroit that’s been on the internets for a while. http://detnews.com/article/20090402/METRO08/904020395/To-urban-hunter–next-meal-is-scampering-by

    But I wouldn’t shoot at chickens. Just lure them in with a little cereal and grab them by the neck as they feed. Believe it or not, they’ll keep on eating while you’re slitting their throats.

  10. Mikee Says:

    Here in Texas we have a problem with suburban coyotes. Not that they don’t eliminate a good many useless cats; they do that quite well. The problem is the suburbanites get upset when a coyote is seen chasing and catching a duck at the neighborhood pond, adjacent to the elementary school. I suspect if the Bronx chickens stay around long enough, an Urban Coyote will eat one or two.

    Emails fly throughout the neighborhood watch group. Parents call Animal Control (“Not foaming at the mouth? Catching pond ducks? That’s a normal coyote, then. Have a nice day.”) and expect someone to DO SOMETHING.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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