In Light Of Recent Episodes, CDC Makes Statement That Zombies Don’t Actually Exist
Posted in uncategorized on June 5th, 2012 by SayUncle | RSS 2.0 |
Be careful, or will be getting a visit from Agent Franks.
Yet. They don’t actually exist…yet.
FIFY
They’ll keep saying that, right up to where you’re swinking a banjo in the Twinkie aisle.
If you’re eating someone’s face or other body part while it’s still attached and kicking, I’m saying you’re a zombie.
Of course if you’re eating a face or body part of a corpse then you’re just a ghoul.
The CDC didn’t make a public statement that zombies don’t exist. They responded to an email from HufPo and in it they said
“CDC does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead (or one that would present zombie-like symptoms),”.
Zombies DO exist! The mindless parasites have been among us for decades! We know them as…. LIBERALS! 🙂
Zombies are metaphors for mindless implacable evil, sort of like OWS is to liberalism, or hippies in a drum circle are to humanity.
You Zed assholes need to get real and prepare for Aliens. They could realistically arrive any minute, or never.
One thing is for certain, they cannot be stopped.
The CDC does have a hilarious zombie parody on their website.
Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.
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June 5th, 2012 at 9:04 am
Be careful, or will be getting a visit from Agent Franks.
June 5th, 2012 at 9:17 am
Yet. They don’t actually exist…yet.
FIFY
June 5th, 2012 at 9:29 am
They’ll keep saying that, right up to where you’re swinking a banjo in the Twinkie aisle.
June 5th, 2012 at 10:34 am
If you’re eating someone’s face or other body part while it’s still attached and kicking, I’m saying you’re a zombie.
Of course if you’re eating a face or body part of a corpse then you’re just a ghoul.
June 5th, 2012 at 11:39 am
The CDC didn’t make a public statement that zombies don’t exist. They responded to an email from HufPo and in it they said
“CDC does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead (or one that would present zombie-like symptoms),”.
June 5th, 2012 at 12:52 pm
Zombies DO exist! The mindless parasites have been among us for decades! We know them as…. LIBERALS! 🙂
June 5th, 2012 at 2:05 pm
Zombies are metaphors for mindless implacable evil, sort of like OWS is to liberalism, or hippies in a drum circle are to humanity.
June 5th, 2012 at 3:40 pm
You Zed assholes need to get real and prepare for Aliens. They could realistically arrive any minute, or never.
One thing is for certain, they cannot be stopped.
June 6th, 2012 at 8:09 pm
The CDC does have a hilarious zombie parody on their website.